When it hurts, observe. Life is trying to teach you something.
Anita Krizzan, poet
I’m a survivor of Childhood Sexual Abuse and a survivor of recovering from CSA’s festering wounds and their exquisite pain. Yes, recovery and healing hurts before it sets me free. The pattern in my healing journey plays out like this….I get to the brink of nearly unbearable emotional pain. Intense pain that almost convinces me that pounding my head against a brick wall would be soothing. I writhe in anguish within my skin while miraculously keeping it together outwardly – meeting obligations, fulfilling responsibilities.
At some point, I tumble into a yawning pit of despair and roll around miserably, certain that the darkness will never subside. Yet, without fail, the darkness does lift, and the sun shines brighter as I emerge to a new perspective; as if from the pit of deepest despair I’m lifted to a mountain top on a clear day with glorious possibilities expanding at my feet.
The storm passes, leaving me with more of myself intact than I believed possible. This is the journey of healing. I give thanks.
- What is your healing journey? What patterns do you see in your recovery?
- What gives you hope, even when you are in despair?